8.12.2010

time grows short.


A catastrophe occurred this summer. Although I wasn't there to witness it, my soul exists very near its epicenter.

It's been interesting to observe my reaction. I've felt stripped down to the skeleton of my character and belief. I've made snap judgements based on intuition alone. It's exposed what I'm made of.

It's awakened an urgent yearning to be with all the ones I love, no matter where they are or where they've been. It's made me feel like growing up, like having babies; like living a life that recognizes above all else that we exist to learn to love others.

I feel like life is short; I must do the most important things first to pack them all in while I am still breathing.

Yes, I will be ok. The world will be ok. But this stuff really does change you.

8.01.2010

hard times.


Believe it or not, but Google told me to take the wrong train last Friday morning. I was supposed to get off at "9th St." from the R and got off at "9th Ave" from the D instead (both were two stops down on their respective lines.) When I finally recognized my mistake, I was 50 minutes away from my destination and already 15 minutes late for a meeting with a freelance client who's number I didn't have. It started raining and I also didn't have my umbrella.

When I finally arrived an hour and a half late, completely soaked, the client was gone. His wife greeted me at the door with a smile and let me in. She'd been feeding the most beautiful, smiling, dark-haired baby. On the sofa sat two soft and lazy cats. She gave me the files I needed and wished me well.

I can never feel too sorry for myself in New York. And I've had some bad times here. There is so much life going on around me that causes me to see outside myself.

I lost my way to the subway station after getting the files and the rain escalated to a downpour. I watched homeless men, asian tourists, muslim women, art students, and small families all rush to find shelter.