settling up.

Another thing I love about blogging is the obligation to write. I'm kind of always thinking up what the next entry will be.
I love this because I believe that the writing process can be so effectively therapeutic.
I want to be a good writer because I want to command language. Regardless of the situation or application, I want to manipulate words to say and mean exactly what I want them to, what I need them to. I don't want my ideas or communications to be shaped by the words available to me, but rather allow my ideas to emerge independently, and then use language as a tool to express them in their essence; and so that others can clearly understand.
Writing is therapeutic for me because in order to figure out how to express something well, I must figure out exactly what I think or mean first.
I used to rely on commonly used phrases to get me through a situation, to force a mutual understanding, but words alone cannot be used as a crutch. I believe that my reliance on common phrases reflected my need to consider something more carefully; that it was indicative of carelessness toward the subject or even denial. Definitely the more I think about writing, the more I consider my life as a connected series of events with causes and effects. I perceive it as being linked to a greater network of relationships and I'm able to see myself more clearly through other perspectives.
This is partially why I'm moving everything out of my storage unit and into the old, downstairs room I used to occupy in high school. I need to take better command of my present life experience. In considering writing about my experience living upstairs and my current relationships with my parents, it's become clear that I must start occupying my own space, and create my own sanctuary. They've been generous to share theirs for a while, but it's time. And really, they'll still just be upstairs.