some birthdays.

I haven't uploaded many photos lately. When I did this morning, there were only photos from Whitney's birthday in November and some that Mike Alger took at my birthday party on Saturday:

shout outs.

Maybe there's something I've forgotten to clarify in my 1.5 years of regular blogging:

I became very isolated and lonely when I was married. As much as I naturally love to talk, most of my thoughts never reached my lips because my life had become something I had to hide from everyone.

The happiest and most glorious moment of my life was when I was driving away from my marriage. I humored so many thoughts of reconnecting with others. I imagined myself being Whitney's roommate. I imagined sitting for hours speaking with my mother. It felt like I was flying.

I called this blog socialexplosion because I'd been pent up and held back for so long that the inertia of my desire to socialize felt like a breaking dam or a bomb.

There are a few people in particular who withstood the power of my social force with love, patience, and strength:

The first is my mother. She received me with open arms and fulfilled all of the dreams I carried of reconnecting with her. I am late to school most mornings but it is not because I am dawdling. I am talking with her. It's a routine I just can't give up. I tell her all about my life as she's preparing my lunch and we always get a bit carried away. There's a lot of love in the mornings at our house.

The second is Whitney. Whitney guided me back into the world of singles with grace and confidence. I needed her and she knew it. I've never had a happier summer than the one I spent with Whitney.

The third is Mike Alger. I met Mike at midnight at an ihop for a Kohler's co-worker gathering that Whitney took me to. He said he was interested in film so I whipped out my foreign film knowledge. Mike doesn't even watch foreign films. But he listened and listened and somehow we exchanged numbers. He's been listening graciously ever since.

The last and certainly not least are my siblings. Although most of them don't live around here, their gestures of forgiveness and love have been some of the most tender. There's been Spanish help at midnight, long letters illustrated with cartoons, nail-painting, long phone calls, and g-chatting from the middle-east in a war zone about my latest dating news. My siblings fortify and lift me.

charmed.

So, I was trying to formulate some dinner plans for Mike Alger's birthday (tomorrrow!) when I stumbled across this website for the awesome Chinese hot pot place in Provo. For some reason, the combo of the home-made aesthetic and jazz music kills me! I hope they never ever hire a graphic designer. I seriously love it.Click on the dumpling!

the virtue of heels.

So, like I was saying in an earlier entry, I recently bought my first pair of high heels. I first tried them on at DSW, mostly out of curiosity, in front of my sisters and my mom. I wanted to see if I could really walk in them. I was feeling a little self-conscious about the overt sexiness of what was on my feet, but everyone seemed to think they were great.

"You totally pull them off," said Marie.

"They look so feminine," said Miriam.

"I think that guys are gonna like those," said my mom.

"Thanks... I love how streamlined the shape is," I replied.

The first guy I showed them to was Mike Alger. I just opened the box and shoved the tissue paper aside.

"Yeah, so it's like my first pair of heels." I thought he might laugh.

"I've gotta say, for a pair of heels, those are pretty awesome."

I wore them a lot at first, for practice walking.
Even my brother complimented the way my legs looked. At church, a guy asked me what leg exercises I did do get my calves to look like that.

"None; it's just the heels. I'm not really used to wearing them."

From a design perspective, heels elongate your legs and make them looked toned. This is, in its own way, really practical. People have known this forever. I feel a little silly that it took me so long to get it.

King Louis XIV had it figured out. Check out this guy's legs... it's certainly more than I'm willing to show.

mike alger is ingenious.

Director Mike's notes: This was for a 24 hour competition, so it had to be shot and edited in 24 hours. Of course, we're awesome so I had it done in 18.
It had to have the theme of "Sacrifice," use the line of dialogue "Let me be your..." and use the object of a match at some point, but be no longer than 3 minutes.

more from mike alger.

This is so amazing I can't believe it. I HAD to repost it here. Feel free to watch it over and over again.

i love mike alger.

So, Mike recently started a vlog. With great enthusiasm, I added it to my blog list (!), but this one is so good that I have to post it here:

(Mike is a cameraman/editor for the local KJZZ station. The footage is from their morning news show.)

intense.

Yes. I am an intense person. I am remembering more and more what I meant when I first verbalized it that way so many years ago. I tried to talk myself out of this fact in an earlier blog entry, but it remains true. Being intense does not mean that I am merely deliberate or calculating. It means that I am intense regarding everything I am interested in. In some ways, I think it's a good quality.

For example, I think I've become a skilled seamstress entirely due to my intense nature. It was my dream to be able to design anything I wanted and have the skills to see it materialize. It was my dream to have a "This I Believe" essay published, and I worked as hard as I could for long hours to make it happen. I think with almost everything I'm good at, it's not so much that I'm full of natural ability, but that I get intensely interested.

But of course, above all, my most favorite thing is people; and my most favorite activity is communication. Lately, all kinds of communication. Email, chatting, phone; of course face to face is my favorite.
The only thing that distracts me from all of my other intense interests is people, and especially people that I adore.

Everyone who knows me knows that I love my little brother, Michael, to the point that I'm doing well to finish speaking about the nature of our relationship with dry eyes.
Whitney's own sister once made a statement like, "to adore Whitney more than Laura would be unhealthy."
And anyone who knows me, knows that I absolutely adore Mike Alger. Not to mention Caleb, Meri, Magnus, Zina, the Vuissas. . . the list could go on and on, and I'm not even getting into the rest of my family members.

The only problem with my intense nature, is that I think it freaks some people out. Conversations with me can often turn into interview questions that can feel reminiscent of a therapy session.

Really, I'm okay with somewhat awkward social exchanges, but I am not okay with people feeling pressured. More than one person in my life has abruptly ended our friendship, because they can't take the love. I guess they think that my intense adoration means that I think we have to be best friends, or lovers, or something. Really, there are way too many people that I adore to make them all best friends or lovers.

I just love the people I love soooo much. That's all there is to it. I've often wished for a naturally indifferent personality, but it's just not gonna happen. Please don't get freaked out.

(how could you not love this guy?)

this is me?

Today as I'm heading toward the bathroom in the HFAC a girl stops me.
"I bet you get this all the time, but you look just like Julie Andrews."
"...No, I don't actually, but... uh, thanks. Like, Sound of Music Julie Andrews?"
"Yeah, with the short hair and her bright blue eyes. . . I can't even think of another movie she's in right now."

I'm not sure what to think, but I'll confess I briefly considered growing my hair. ( I think Mike Alger also said something about me looking like Julie once... that makes 2...)

life is generic.

Mike Alger found this online today at www.foundmagazine.com and I thought it was so funny.
The mission statement of Found: "We collect FOUND stuff: love letters, birthday cards, kids' homework, to-do lists, ticket stubs, poetry on napkins, telephone bills, doodles - anything that gives a glimpse into someone else's life." Then they publish it, of course.
This to-do list was found in Knoxville, Tennessee and featured on their website yesterday. With a few tweaks/exceptions, it could've been mine only 7 months ago; right down to the Depakote notepad.

5k.

I just finished running the anti-pornography 5k with Mike Alger in 34:30. I have nothing to compare this time to because during the last 5k it was raining and windy, and everyone walked (Whitney endured this with me.)

Anyhow, 75% of the reason I went was to get a free t-shirt, and when we checked in, they killed all of my hopes by informing me that you had to be "pre"-registered to get a shirt. We ran it anyway, of course. Mike basically dominated me at running, managing to talk the whole time while I was out of breath, but still claimed to not enjoy it when it was over. He also won two Seven Peaks passes from the raffle--but above all--he got me a t-shirt.

They started throwing them to the crowd at after the raffle was over, but they kept throwing them in the same spots and the tall guys were jumping up and getting all of them. At one point, I even grabbed one, but someone tore it out of my hands.

In the meantime, Mike is standing off the to the side. A shirt gets thrown way over there, and this guy just picks it off the ground. He's standing next to this other guy and they do this "Do you want it? No, you can have it . . ." thing, and Mike talks them into letting me have it.

He also showed me some cool hip-hop on the way home.

So, the moral of the story is that I'm so glad that Mike came to run the anti-porn 5k with me this morning, it made the whole event.