I went to see a psychologist for the first time today in an attempt to clear the cobwebs leftover from my failed marriage.

I remembered one of my favorite games as a kid. There used to be large sheets of plywood scattered all over our backyard. I guess they were leftover building materials from my parents' house. I remember walking through the knee-high grass and spotting the plywood from a distance by the empty spots. Sometimes we'd jump from piece to piece imagining that we were in the ocean. Their weather-warped unsteadiness made it seem like they might actually be floating on water. But more often, we wouldn't step on them at all; we'd lift them up. The most exciting ones revealed the cross-sectioned tunnels of worms and snakes and mice. If we were lucky, a real mouse or snake would dart out and away near our feet. Even the most boring revealed large spiders and centipedes, tangled masses of earwigs, and june bug larvae. I remember the fear and excitement; I loved the unpredictability. But I remember always having mixed feelings about destroying the crusty shelter of all those nasty things.


heidikins said...

Get rid of the crust and the dead mice, it feels fantastic. :o)

Good luck!

mim said...

You can do it. You've got a lot of love and support all around you regardless of what you find and we won't go away. (Even if you want us to. Ha Ha Ha!)

mim said...

Oh, BTW Have you ever read the Deptford Trilogy? Great book about Jungian psychology. It did me a lot of good. It's a fairly gentle approach to knowing and accepting yourself and putting problems into perspective.